3 paths to go, which should i choose?

Sometimes i would always wish to ask,
"GOD, why are you so cruel to me?"
"Why i always such bad luck during my journey?"
"Should i done it or not?"

And now here i come,
The new paths and journey to choose again..=.="
I know recently myself is damm busying with all my stuff
What can i say is; all of it becomes worst after my friend misunderstood me
Some of them even having "cool talk" and "cool war" between their selves
I never been such silent before
That is why i just hope all will back to normal like usual they act to be..

But unluckily to say, even thought we all try to back into the usual situation
There will always be others problem that come towards us..
Sometimes it might overwhelm us until we feel hard to breath!!!

And now, i think i'm going to reach this stage.
I would never aspect that such things will happens over me..
Never and ever think about IT,
Because my main point to enter the UNI is the word;"STUDY"~
Maybe i been influence by others
That is why IT finally becomes the truth!!!
Just like what they all say and tease me, Haiz~~
I can't forget all of it..
It always make me lost my concentration when i start think about it
Conclusion, it start with the word "Complicated"!!!
And most of the time,
The truth that i heard, always be cruel and hurt me..=(

I try to overcomes it slowly because i really want to "GIVE UP" over it.
I know i gonna suffer during this moment and stage..

That is why i need friendship to make me recover;
To give support and hold me when i been drop behind~~~

It does not matter either people treat you good or bad.
In my situation, if you are good to me;
Of course you will get the same result of manners from me
But if you trying to be bad to me, i will revenge it "double" or even "triple"
Until the word "FORGIVENESS" came in my mind

I'm looking for a real friendship,
and i know it is very hard.
That is why i trying to treat people nicely if possible
I always remind myself never ever think to stop "caring", but i haven't reach the stage call "Protecting" people that much
"we might hurt others while Protecting someone"
So please don't over my limits.=)

Maybe that is my fault,
To give others wrong opinion
As i'm trying to caring to others
I don't even know what should i do by now

Pain that won't ever stop come when u heard or saw somethings
That is what i suffer before
And i'm sure i know the feeling very well

Everytimes when it comes with a "PROMISE"
It's sure trap me well..
Ya, i just make a promise with someone, which is "i won't leave you alone"
So don't be afraid, me and others will be there to help and guild you as your friend.

But i never know that after the promise, there still left a new event for me..
I wish i could say "YES".. but myself is doubting
Because i don't want to hurt others
And even myself anymore.
I don't dare to try as i'm less of confident.
Plus i still can't lets go of someone yet..
What to do? I also don't know

Or even i should say,
I still need times to lets IT go..
Ya, i really need times to lets go
And to feel what i can feel by now

I have to take my time, so please don't rush me
Besides that, i can't give my words to others such as "please wait for me"....
Don't put hope on me as myself also never know what will happens next
Because i'm still blur in a stage call "Complicated"

GOD~~ Please make me sleep well today..
Cause i don't wish to have a nightmare!!!


I wish i could find someone that can make me calm down and listen to my voice heart.
There are 3 paths to choose
1st- ignore all of it
2nd- accept the feeling we get
3rd- make others disappointed with me

So which paths should i choose???